Whip it Good!

Set It Free

You've heard the saying if you set something free and it comes back to you, you know it was meant to be. I'm not sure i'm convinced of the truth of that in every context, but this summer i set something i love free. After the Port Authorities' last game on June 13th, Maine Roller Derby officially went on a seven-week summer break. This meant no official practices, no events or appearances, nothing but the monthly dues we each pay to be a member. We've had breaks from practice before, our last one being a brief four-week break last December and January, but after that break we went non-stop with practices (two to three times per week), events, meetings, committee work, bouts, scrimmages, and so forth since January. That's a very long time to be doing something which takes so much time and energy, mentally and physically, without a break.

During league breaks in the past i was always doing a good bit of work for the league as i was the head of Public Relations and Media, a position which entails not only the work described in the title but also serving as essentially a league director, one of the group of other directors who steer the league on a daily basis in both the immediate and long-term sense. Try as we may, the league directors have never been able to truly take a break from the work of running the business because the work never stops even if we're not actively skating and competing. But this year in June i stepped down from that position, so my only responsibility during this break was to relax and to stay in shape.

On previous breaks i worked out like a fiend, fearful of losing the level of fitness needed to play this grueling sport. You can train as hard as you want but what we learned long ago is nothing keeps you in skating shape except for skating. Still, you don't want to lose your overall endurance and strength that was so hard-won. On our break last summer we had one open-skate practice each week, unstructured but available to any skater who wanted to come and workout on skates and hone personal skills. I went to all but one of those last year. This summer was totally different on that level too. I didn't work out at all for a week after our last game. Then i tried to run a few times a week and do some weights and other resistance training at home. I only attend one non-required practice, the last one before break was over. In short, i didn't allow the fear of losing my fitness level haunt me on a daily basis. After two years of training constantly both on and off-skates, i felt it was finally time i take a mental and physical break from that pressure as well and decided to just stay active but not frantic.

Last week, on Monday to be exact, the break was over and practices began. We have slightly less than a month to prep for our first bout, a home game on August 29th with the Port Authorities playing the D.C. Rollergirls. I'll be honest, i wasn't exactly relishing that first practice. Summer break was good to me (despite the distinct lack of summer weather), and i wasn't quite ready for it to be over. I've spent three years thinking of and doing little other than Derby Derby Derby. It's been my passion and my main activity outside of work. This summer i let that go in order to rekindle the love. I still spent time with my derby family, but we kept the derby talk to a minimum as we all needed a break from it. It felt bizarre not having skates on my feet, not talking about strategy and teams and promotion every day, not checking scores of other games happening around the nation. For a while i feared the love had left me.

But what i realized is that you can take a true break from the relentlessness of it and still love it. Our first practice felt good. Ok, not all good - it was really painful! The calluses on the feet had softened, shoulders which had just started healing from injury were battered once more, and the heat! oh the heat. Of course the heat had to hit us for that first night back in the stuffy, un-airconditioned Expo, and then it hit even worse on our second practice. But i felt the beauty of eight wheels under my control. I snuggled in a giant pack with my leaguemates as we skated in close-quarters, getting used to the feel again of jumping and swerving around basically on top of each other. I remembered what truly rested muscles feel like and what they can do - amazing, explosive, powerful things! In one jam i felt like i basically flew through the pack, my rested leg muscles propelling me around and past blockers in big leaps. I had let all that go, and now i can feel it coming back to me with all the love i've always had, but also with a newfound balance that i hope i can maintain.

Enter the Killer, and Here Comes the Roller Derby

You may notice that I am not the infamous and witty Punchy O'Guts, your fearless Whip It Good blogger up to this point. The Punchinator, while still taking out skaters with her ferocious hits and pointing and laughing all the way home, has passed this blog onto the likes of me. While I cannot guarantee I can fill her skates in every way, I can assure you that we're keeping it all in the four-eyed derby family here (observe photo above). That's right folks # we make the glasses the geeky kid wore in gym class sexy.

Enough of introductions. It's time for an update on the happenings in Maine Roller Derby.

We've recently come back from a theoretical one-month break. I say theoretical because even though we took practices down to once a week for the month of July, suspended attendance requirements for the month, and the organizers swore off any but the most urgent derby-related work, to be honest none of us are really able to step away from the obsession that is roller derby. Nonetheless, the break was refreshing and we're full-speed ahead prepping for our fall series of bouts at the Portland Expo. Let's revisit those, shall we?

Saturday, September 13th, Port Authorities vs. Montreal's New Skidz on the Block. Live music by the Pubcrawlers (bagpipes, yea!). Donate art supplies at the door and receive $2 off adult ticket price (door tickets only), to benefit A Company of Girls.

Saturday, September 27th, Calamity Janes vs. New Hampshire Roller Derby. Band is TBA for the moment, but you can donate non-perishable food or personal care items at the door and receive $2 off adult ticket price (again, door tickets only), to benefit People's Regional Opportunity Program (PROP).

Saturday, October 11th, Port Authorities vs. Coal City Rollers. Band and charity TBA for now.

All bouts start with doors and band at 5 pm, and derby action at 6 pm. Keep checking our website for more updates on bands and charity info.

Tickets? Why yes, we do have tickets, at our fantastic fair-trade ticketing company Brown Paper Tickets, and at Bull Moose Music locations.

For the uber-fans who don't want to miss a second of the action, you can buy a season ticket at Bull Moose Music for $20. That's three bouts for the price of two. You can't beat that. Seriously people, get tickets now and skip the line at the door so you can grab the coveted front-row seats in the stands, the beer garden, or for the really gung-ho, trackside seats right on the floor.

Now that I've got that out of the way, I can promise you some more substantive entries coming up. Bated breath, people…I want to see bated breath.

Rat City Rollergirls vs. Starbucks

Starbucks is taking Rat City Rollergirls to court over a similar-looking logo.

Rat City Rollergirls have faced some seriously tough competition in their quest to become champions of the roller derby circuit, but the local team may be facing their toughest competitor to date--off the track. The current battle pits Rat City Rollergirls vs. the Starbucks Corporation in the legal arena, rather than an old hangar at Magnuson Park. At stake in the battle is no trophy or championship, but rather trademark issues and the right to keep a beloved logo.

Read more here. And screw Starbucks and their tasty coffees. I won't be purchasing any EVER AGAIN!

Roller Derby on Newsweek!

Featured this week as a video blog on Newsweek was Boston Derby Dames and Gotham Girls Roller Derby. This is particularly huge for the roller derby community as we are working to bash those stereotypes of roller derby depicted as a staged, fake event. Flat-track roller derby is a SPORT, people! It's hard to be recognized as such because of it's history and it's quirkiness, but I assure you, my friend, Roller Derby is a sport.

This is such a big deal for roller derby. Most of our press coverage is teacher-by-day-hell-on-wheels-by-night type of crap. While it's exciting to play up injuries and "personas" (which, on our league, just doesn't exist), it does nothing for legitimizing the sport.

I've got Olympic dreams. I want to see roller derby on ESPN. Maybe it won't happen until years after I've retired, but I want to see it happen. Good grief, I love this sport.

The video blog is found at www.newsweek.com/. You've got to search on the right of the home page in the video blogs where you'll find the two-part series.

Guide to the best bouting experience

The Portland Expo's maximum capacity for roller derby bouts is 2200. The most we've had so far was a little over 800 people at one time and we're expecting a few hundred more this season.

Here are some tips for the best experience:

THE BEER GARDEN
This is a gated area where those 21+ can purchase and drink beer. Cash only and bring your ID. I'm guessing between 250-300 people can fit in there. The best view of the game is standing along the gate or sitting at the top of the bleachers. You don't want to sit at the bottom row of the bleachers because a hundred people will be standing in front of you.

TRACKSIDE SEATING
You may sit on the floor around the track. There is a taped circle 10 feet outside of the track. You must stay behind this at all times. Sitting trackside is at your own risk. We suggest that anyone under 18 does NOT sit trackside.

BLEACHERS
There are two sets of bleachers on the left and right of the track. The set to the left have the team benches and scorekeepers in front. The skaters are required to sit when not skating as not to obstruct view from fans. There will be managers & coaches standing in the area, so they may block some view, but you also get the inside scoop on team strategy, line-ups and penalties. This side also has the penalty box. The right side isn't as exciting, but you will have a pretty good view of the game.

HANDICAPPED
There is a small area in front of the beer garden taped off for our handicapped fans.

MRD vs. Western Mass Destuction (Sept 07) at the Portland Expo
photo by John Santerre

TIPS FOR FANS
1. Bring Cash.
2. Hold onto your program if you want an autograph after the bout.
3. Doors open at 5 pm. Come early and save a seat. You won't be bored because the band plays until 6 pm.
4. Bring a camera - rollergirls are wicked photogenic and love to be photogaphed with their fans. Warning!! - should you get close you will inhale a pungent stank.
5. After the bout, party with the skaters at Rivalries. Rollergirls love to eat and drink about a big game. Both teams attend and celebrate together.

Past, Present & Future

After an off season (of skates, not business) through the holidays, Maine Roller Derby is back in full effect. Here's the scoop on the 2008 Season.

WHAT HAS HAPPENED

* New Recruit Day brought in a dozen or so lovely Fresh Meat ladies who are training hard to be the next big roller derby sensation.
* Our Anti-Valentine's Day event was a terrible success with tons of people supporting our hatred of love. Feel it Robot and Don Creeper provided live music and the rollergirls read letters and poems of hatred.
* Maine Roller Derby has two official teams scheduled to play interleague bouts against leagues all over the East Coast and Canada! The Port Authorities is made up of the all-star players. The Calamity Janes is made up of the fabulous girls who rock the track, but haven't yet excelled to all-starness.
* The Port Authorities played their first exhibition bout against the Boston Massacre in the Shriner's Auditorium in Massachusetts on March 8. The bout was a short 30 minute period of helmet-rattling fury. The Massacre won (81-51) and the Port Authorities left with a long list of training to-dos before the first official bout of the season.

WHAT'S COMING UP!

* Our Lucky Lass Throwdown is scheduled for this Saturday (March 15) at Bubba's, where there will be plenty of dancing, leg-wrestling, arm-wrestling and other shenanigans.
* The 2008 Bouting Season!!
April 12: Port Authorities vs Rhode Island Riveters
with live music by Lovewhip
May 3: Port Authorities vs Long Island Roller Rebels
with Edith Jones Project
May 17: Port Authorities vs Connecticut Stepford Sabotage
with Lady Kensington & the Beatlords
June 7: Calamity Janes vs Providence Killah Bees
with Feel it Robot
Sept 13: Port Authorities vs Montreal
Sept 27: Calamity Janes vs NH Skate Free or Die
Oct 11: Port Authorities vs PA Coal City Rollers

All bouts are at the Portland Expo on Saturday at 6 pm. Bouting music provided by wepushbuttons. Advance tickets cost $10. Tickets at the door are $12 for adults, $5 for kids aged 6-12 and free for kids 5 and under.

*The Calamity Janes will travel to New York to play the Hudson Valley Horrors (the team MRD played during the heat stroke bout of 2007) on June 28.

WHAT'S HAPPENING NOW

*We're all training our sweet butts off 2-3 times a week, gearing up for the a season against more challenging teams and preparing our Fresh Meat for the track.
* MRD is also working to give back to the community in the following ways.
1. Look for a booth with art at the bouts. This art work is for sale with all proceeds going to the Frannie Peabody Center.
2. Bring a donation (canned goods, personal care products, non-perishable foods) to the May 3 bout and receive $2 off the $12 bout ticket. These donations go to the Preble Street Food Pantry.

Get your tickets for the 2008 season now! We packed around 800 people in last time and are expecting an even bigger turn out this year!

Go to www.mainerollerderby.com or any Bull Moose Store for tickets.

Thanks and see you at the bout!

Are you for Real?

We've been recruiting since derby existed in Maine. I'm jealous of my hometown, Pittsburgh, where they started the Steel City Derby Dames the same time MRD started up and they have something like six teams. Maine just doesn't have the big population pool to recruit from.
We rollergirls are always sizing up women, talking to them about joining, and at almost all of our events there are tons of girls - usually drunk ones - that are pumped to join derby. We all get excited about our new friends and potential derby sisters. But, alas, we never see their faces again.

Last Sunday, we held our first "Recruitment Day," which was quite successful. We had 17 girls sign on and jibber about how they want to skate with us. This is fantastic. And even more fantastic is that a few actually showed up at Tuesday's practice.

But I'm not getting my hopes up. I've waisted far too many nights blubbering about how derby is so wonderful and how it changes your life, blah blah, and been burned far too many times by girls with their fake promises of joining.

So hey new derby girls - let's see what you're made of. Don't let your commitment-phobia ruin it for you and the rest of us! PROVE YOURSELVES!