What are people's sexpectations??? God sometimes I wish I knew! I was out with some friends at the Ice Bar Party Saturday night at the Portland Harbor Hotel and I mentioned something about a booty call. One of my friends promptly interjected that she never gets the booty call only calls from guys to come over and watch movies. Ok, what are the sexpectations there as I promptly replied “hellooooo, that IS the booty call!"

It's clear that we all have a different interpretation of what is the right sexual etiquette. Is it ok for people to expect to have sex on the second or third date? Or does it mean you’re promiscuous if you have sex on the first date? Should you act on the booty call? Is our culture leading to more Risqué Business and if you don't participate in that more aggressive behavior will people not accept you or desire you as much? Or do old traditional values still prevail when the relationship merits putting in the time and effort and if so, how do you know when that is the case? What are the rules and when do they apply?

I could ponder this indefinitely. Ultimately we each need to set our own sexpectations. If you are a responsible adult and want to enjoy sex regularly, then do it. If you are not comfortable with something then abstaining can be equally as provocative and sexy. Gone seem to be the days when one set of rules should dictate all. As Madonna says Express Yourself. Be confident in whatever your decision is and communicate it freely to the person or people you are involved with. And just as much as the one set of rules does not fit all theory the same goes for one set of rules isn't what you need to adopt absolutely. You may have some people that come into your life that you choose to be more liberal with your sexual adventures and other people or times that you choose to be more reserved or guarded. Whatever you choose, communicate what you want and be responsible and safe not only physically but emotionally in your choices. Remember whether your male or female sex is at its best when the two parties involved have the same sexpectations! Enjoy!