Perhaps the headline reminds you of an old boyfriend.

But alas, I refer instead to Saturday's Kentucky Derby.

The Junior League of Portland hosted a Kentucky Derby party upstairs at Foreplay - and the big hats were in abundance.

I showed up hatless - and in a pair of jeans - and felt severely under dressed. What, with all the quaint summer dresses and all.

The perfect opportunity to don a freakishly large lid, and I missed it.

My excuse: I prepared a quiche for the event.

Stop laughing - people actually ate it and most of them are still well enough to talk about it.

Aside from the big brimmed classics, there were some crafty hats too. This pink one reminds my of a My Little Pony I had once. Maybe I still have it. What's it to you?

Of course, if the hat envy becomes too much to bear, you can always fake it. (Remember how you handled that other old boyfriend?)

Three cheers for Photoshop!

My gamble on Papa Clem didn't yield me any prize money, but I did leave with a Kentucky Derby glass (which I accidentally broke the next day).

At least I have the memories.

Big hats and big winnings on Derby day