The Amazing Race (peninsula edition)

Portland is said to be a walking city (i.e., in comparison to its larger urban cousins, the peninsula's small square footage makes it easy to navigate on foot).

I had the opportunity to test that theory this weekend during Portland West's Think. Go. Get it. race across Portland (and I have the strained calf muscles to prove it. Oh, and all the photos).

The event served as a fundraiser for the West End social service agency - and it sent participants on an Amazing Race-like tour of the city.

A friend and I showed up at Reiche School early Saturday morning to see a good collection of folks already congregated near the playground. Our competition.

It was clear that we weren't going to win the "matching uniforms" portion of the event. We both happened to be wearing fleeces, but that wouldn't stand up to the crafty duos I spotted milling about.

This pair opted for a "Joe the Plumber" theme. The back of the gray t-shirt has a roll of toilet paper on it and says, "That's how I roll."

I asked if the plungers would be used as weapons during the competition (I didn't read "no shanking" in the rulebook) but apparently they were simply props.

By 10:00 am everyone had been checked in and the Portland West volunteers gave us the details.

We'd be given a list of clues, each of which would direct us to a specific location on the peninsula. To prove we'd been there, we needed to snap a photo of both teammates at the destination.

And (hallelujah) we could phone a friend, Google the heck out of clues and pester strangers on the street.

We had three hours to complete as many of the clues as possible. And only our own two feet or the city bus could be used to get around. Volunteers would be everywhere, we were told, so no cheating.

With the swift rip of an envelop, the race began. Some pairs bolted out of the park without seeming to know where they were going. Some lingered to read the clues and come up with a plan. Michelle and I started with an easy one:

"Find Coffee by Design on Congress street. Find the man with a polka-dotted shirt and green eyes and have your picture taken with him."

We found the coffee shop easily. But there wasn't a polka-dot man to be seen.

We re-read the clue, looked again. Finally a woman behind the counter gestured to a large mural on the wall.

Ah, sneaky.



Next: "Go to Longfellow Square and take a picture with the ladybug."

We circled the Longfellow statue, scoured the benches, even peered in the One Longfellow Square windows. Then, at my feet, I saw bricks imprinted with an array of animal life. The ladybug must be somewhere in these here fancy bricks - the ones I never noticed before.

One clue led us to the Thomas Brackett Reed statue on the Western Prom. Once there we needed to fill out a crossword puzzle in order to uncover the next clue. (Bless you Michelle for already knowing that lobsterss teeth are in their stomachs.) The crossword led us to Tsunami Tattoo on Pleasant Street where we needed to apply a Portland West temporary tattoo. (I asked if getting a real one would ensure our victory. I was told no. Too bad, I would've done it.)

One clue led us to the art studio of City Councilor David Marshall, but he was helping to clean up Dow Street. A note indicated that he'd be happy to take a picture with us as long as we brought him one piece of trash (because every bit helps, people!).

We also took a trip to the popular Fish Market with the red facade down off Commercial Street. There we sought out "Buzzy" as requested and took a photo with him and our free gift (a fish market magnet).

Michelle and I traipsed along the streets of Portland until we finally knocked every clue off the list. We headed back to Reiche. On the way we saw the Joe the Plumber pair running up the street ahead of us. For a moment I thought maybe we should run, too. Luckily the thought passed.

At the finish our evidence was checked. Our photos were looked at, the tattoos were shown and the completed crossword was reviewed.

Our final time: an hour and 59 minutes.

And Michelle and I won! Well, not first place. Or second. Or third.

We won in that intangible we're-still-winners- even-if-we-didn't-win kind of way.

This pair won first place with a time of 1:05 ==>

Michelle and I chalked it up to the fact that they had an iPhone and we were just working with Blackberrys. iPhones do tell the future now, I'm pretty sure, so they had the advantage of knowing the clues in advance. I think there might be a jet pack application as well, which could account for their speedy finish.

But there was free grub after the race, so I guess it all evens out. Winners got cash prizes, I got two hot dogs.

Plus I think I gleaned some interesting Portland facts from the experience (like how George Cleeve founded Portland but nobody seems to like him much now).

I also learned that the distance between the East End and the West End grows exponentially depending on how hungry you are. And I learned that scavenging is so much better when you do it during the day and without the ski mask.

And hey, it was an ideal way to get acquainted with parts of the city I wasn't familiar with.

If you missed out on this event, don't fret. There's more Saturday peninsula fun to be had.

Next Saturday, October 26th:

"East End vs. West End All-City, All-Day Capture the Flag-O-Rama in Portland"

The Capture the Flag festivities kick off at 11:30 am in Monument Square.

Find all the details on Facebook

[See all the photos from Think. Go. Get it.]