It has been widely documented and reported that parental rage and misconduct in youth sports has become commonplace.

The trial of Thomas Junta, the hockey parent who was found guilty of involuntary manslaughter in the beating death of another hockey parent inside a hockey rink in Massachusetts, has emerged as a symbol of youth sports gone awry. This, and other cases of parental brawls and fights are now frequent occurrences in youth sports. In February 2002, all the amateur hockey referees in Canada went on strike for a day to protest the constant abuse they receive from players and parents.

The same kind of explosive events are happening on a daily basis as the nation’s press report. For example:

• Parents and players hurled profanities and threats at each other in the parking lot after a recent high school basketball playoff game. During the game, several fights broke and many fans were observed making obscene gestures and screaming profanities at each other, the officials, and even the players.

• One Little Leaguer was ejected from a game for cursing at the umpire after several fans had been doing the same thing. The umpire asked that the offending spectators be removed before the game could continue.

• Another Little Leaguer beat an opponent to death with a baseball bat after some post game teasing.

• A 14 year old soccer player was ejected and suspended for screaming a racial slur at an opponent.

• Two youth hockey coaches on the same team started fighting with each other during a game of ten and eleven year olds. The coach of the opposing team broke up the fight.

• The coach of a girl’s soccer team had to ask the parent of one of his players to leave the field because he refused to stop running up and down the sidelines coaching his daughter.

• Two hockey moms were arrested for inciting a riot and for assaulting each other.

• The father of a high school softball player beat his daughter’s coach senseless with a baseball bat.

• An enraged father shot his son’s football coach with a hunting rifle over playing time.

• Another madman pulled a .357 Magnum on his son’s coach over playing time.

But, the real dangers in youth sports do not grab the headlines. Consider the following grim facts from a study conducted by the Minnesota Amateur Sports Commission:

• 45.3 percent of kids surveyed said they had been called names, yelled at, or insulted by coaches

• 21 percent said they had been pressured to play with an injury

• 17.5 percent said they had been hit, kicked, or slapped

• 8 percent said they had been called names with sexual connotations

• 3.4 percent said they had been sexually abused. This final number is very conservative because not many will admit it.

Another study conducted and presented in a paper to the American Alliance for Health surveyed 1,183 athletes ages 11-14. 35% said they planned to stop playing the next year.

The same researchers surveyed the parents of 418 athletes aged 6-10, and 50% of those parents said their child was not interested in the sport any more and would stop playing. Other studies conclude that as many as 75% of the kids who begin playing a sport at an early age have dropped out by age 15, the year they enter high school!

Youth Sports Have Failed Our Children
Children play sports to have fun, be with friends and develop their skills. Studies show that they drop out when these needs are not being met. Children burning out on play doesn’t make sense and should not be allowed to happen. When 75% of them quit playing before puberty, how can anyone deny that youth sports are in serious trouble?

A study sponsored by The Youth Sports Institute at Michigan State listed the top ten reasons why kids quit:

1. They lost interest
2. They were not having fun
3. It required too much time
4. The coach played favorites
5. The coach was a poor teacher
6. They got tired of playing
7. Too much emphasis on winning
8. They wanted to participate in other non-sport activities
9. They needed more time to study
10. There was too much pressure

The reasons kids quit are proof that youth sports organized by adults have clearly failed our children. Adults have assumed control of every aspect of youth sports, and in the process have taken the games and the fun away from the children. If we respect our children, why shouldn’t they have a say in how sports and play are organized for them?

As adults, we have also failed to provide for the emotional training of our children. Not much is being done to help young athletes deal with the many emotional problems they face at the hands of “well-meaning” parents and coaches. Not many parents and coaches are even aware of their own patterns of emotional behavior that are the causes of emotional problems in their children.

Sports psychologists are very much aware of the effects of fear, not only on child development, but on athletic performance. Most athletes, and especially young ones, experience fear as a result of their participation in youth sports. Many are fearful of disappointing their parents and coaches. They are fearful of the emotional outbursts, put downs and abusive treatment by parents and coaches. Young athletes are fearful of failure and public humiliation.

Many young athletes who have experienced success are even afraid of success because they fear they might not be able to sustain it. This situation has led many psychologists to refer to youth sports as a form of “legalized child abuse.”

Unrealistic expectations lead to pressure, which in turn leads to frustration for both parent and child. The frustration leads to anger and depression. The emotional side of sports – the way athletes feel about themselves and how those feelings help or hinder athletic performance – is the single, most critical issue affecting children who participate in youth sports.

Youth sports can provide the young athlete and their parents with many benefits, but overbearing coaches, over involved parents and the fear of failure can negate these benefits for most kids.

If you would like to read more, visit my website at: www.thecenterforkidsfirst.org Click on "Sports" and then "Articles."

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